Body funk

In prep for our future bambino I had planned to be in spectacular decent shape before getting pregnant. I was running on the treadmill somewhat consistent beforehand but after being a an athlete (swimmer) for so many years I felt capable of more. So I tried P90X again. The first time was last summer, but I had really become comfortable with running and school was starting so I didn't have the mental motivation to continue.

About the same time that I started P90X I had to switch from the NuvaRing to the pill. I've heard great things about the ring but after 5 months on it I had to stop using it. So I stopped running completely stupid move and committed myself to P90X, I also had the Man guarantee that this time he would help push, yell, taunt me do the workout everyday. So after one month on the pill and one week of P90x I was UP 6 pounds 150 to 156. THAT'S RIGHT I SAID UP!!! That's right I weigh 156 pounds, I said it!

I will disheartened to say the least, but I've kept with it. The whole first month thinking, "What am I doing wrong? why am I gaining SO much? Should I quit and go back to running?" But I said I'd do it, the whole 90 days so I kept on. My hunger level definitely went up. By snack time at school you could hear my stomach growl. I tried a lot of different things, more breakfast, better breakfast, more liquids. What's been somewhat working lately is having a Luna bar. But I still feel hungry.

I did some research and talked with my doctor about it who reminded me that it's not uncommon for women to gain 10-15 on the pill (HOLY CRAP!). So I just finished week 7 of P90X, more than halfway through it. The scale says I'm up, its not a lot I know, but I've worked pretty hard since Tucker was born to stay at this weight of 150, its where I feel comfortable. Some clothes fit differently but I was seeing some tone in areas, and some clothes, pants mostly, didn't fit. This morning was when it hit. I pulled a pair of my favorite pants out of the warm weather tote, pants that were nice and loose last summer, they looked awful! How can I be doing this work, for so long, and still be up?

So I pondered, my eating hasn't been the best, I didn't do the P90X food plan because I'm so picky I don't like half of what's included. I have 10 days left on the pill, 10!!! What's going to happen when I stop taking it? This week I'm going back to protein shakes in the morning with a Luna Bar, a better lunch, dinner, and small snack if need be. Today I talked some with my mom about all of this and she asked what am I going to feel like when I gain baby weight again? I'm actually excited about that, I can't wait to have a big 'ol belly with a growing baby in it. I just want to be healthy beforehand to keep that baby healthy.

So she asked, is it worth worrying about my weight being up 6 pounds if in the next year (God willing) I want gain even more? Mom always have that other perspective!