I've been stewing over this post for a while, but after reading lots of articles and other new mommy blogs I started thinking, "Why not?"
Becoming a new mom again, I figured it would be much easier this time around. I didn't have to worry about jumping right back into school or work this time, Tucker would still be in school for the first month, and I knew what I was doing this time around. Just typing this makes me want to go back and slap myself or just laugh out loud. Being a mom is tough.
There, I said it. Being a mom is tough. However, it's the most rewarding "job" I've ever had. I don't know if I'm just blessed with two extremely sweet boys or what but no matter what one or both of them does something to just make my heart swell. They also have the ability to need something at the same time, immediatly. To make me feel like I can't get anything right but I'm the only thing they want, again at the same time.
It took about a month for me to "wake up" to the idea that it wasn't easy with two. Things won't go as planned. Just because Ryker took a nap the night before so I could make dinner wouldn't mean he would do it again the next day. Tucker has the capability to play and read for hours, doesn't mean he won't ask 1000 questions while doing it. There are so many days I feel like I let them or my husband down. Maybe we didn't get outside for Tucker to ride his bike or I didn't clean up the kitchen, but the boys are content and I haven't lost my mind.
I also had to follow the rule that all mama's break- asking/ letting people help. After spending everyday with Ryker I just felt like no one else was good enough for him- I may still kind of think that. I had to let the Man do more when he was home. He was fully capable of giving baths, bottles, or starting laundry. I had to stop thinking that I could do it all. I had to talk to the Man more and tell him what i need. At the same time I realized, with the help of the Man, that I'm not someone who does well without a schedule/ plan.
( not my planner but the same as what I use)
I'm a type A kind of person. Going from teaching everyday with a some-what permanent schedule to not having one at all wasn't working for my mind set. It threw me for such a loop. So I started to break up the things I wanted/ needed to get done each week. Basically I try to get a load of laundry completely done each day, washed, dried, and put away. I also really focused on exercising somehow everyday. The Man and I are now doing "Insanity" together. And most of all I find time for me to be alone sometime throughout the day. Even if it's for 10 minutes after everyone is in bed or I take a long shower when the Man is home, it's just me.
Yesterday I had picked up a sweet tea from McDonald's, a big one! Not five minutes after we got home I spilled it all over the floor. I was so mad at myself, I ruined my treat! But after a second and a couple deep breaths I realized it was tea and went for the mop. No biggie.
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